Category: Mr. Goodkat: A Kansas City Shuffle is when everybody looks right, you go left.
Nick: Never heard of it.
Mr. Goodkat: It’s not something people hear about. Falls on deaf ears mostly. This particular one has been over twenty years in the making. No small matter. Requires a lot of planning. Involves a lot of people. People connected by the slightest of events. Like whispers in the night, in that place that never forgets, even when those people do. It starts with a horse.- From the movie Lucky Number Slevin
As I alluded to in my prior post, Jig, Pat, and I went out shopping on Tuesday, and Pat S. ended up buying a rug. We all were present, but none of us saw anything. The only person who ‘saw’ something was the rug and shawl salesman that works inside the hotel…and he wasn’t even there. And without this gentleman’s help, the perfect crime would’ve been maintained and no one would’ve ever known.
Looking back on this event, it’s amazing how perfectly executed, how flawless the technique was of the “salesman.”
Two white-boys and a Gujarati? This has to be a set of travelers. Oh, your friend speaks Hindi? Even better!
The “salesman”, sensing that the facade of ‘knowledge’ we were wearing was nothing more than a thin veneer, proceeded to press all the right buttons.
You’re looking for quality, here is the quality! Whomever told you that there was 79503 knots per square inch, they are not looking out for you like I will look out for you. I come from Kashmir, and as part of selling cooperative, I cannot set price. Weaver sets price, I act on their behalf. I can price so that I make a small margin, you do want me to make small margin correct?
Indeed. The sales technique at this point was common, easy to spot. He wanted to be our friend, like every Indian on the subcontinent with a store full of goods. Rupees are hard to come by like rain in the summer, except amongst travelers who ‘make it rain’ on demand. Looking around this store, you almost get the feeling of a spider web; the goods for sale on the first floor are only to lure you in, to make you think a quick, small purchase is possible. Until you hear, “Please sir, come take a look at my rugs.”
An hour in, our eyes are tired. After seeing many patterns and sizes across two different stores, with different floor coverings and lighting schemes, it’s tough to distinguish anymore.
“Can I offer you some tea, a Coke, some water? No? Please sir, this is sealed water, we do not do that (refilled bottles) here. We order two cases of water per day, to serve our most valuable customer.”
Too many sizes, too many patterns, and too many opinions…that was it. With the pattern chosen by Pat, a handshake and a smile sealed the deal. Thirty minutes before, the price had been determined, so the only thing left to finish up this adventure was to wrap up the carpet into a carry-on sized package, and of course, pay. Little did we know how critical it was the Pat paid for his purchase with a credit card.
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